Girl at the Electronic Catalogue
The bright screen as I pass
Alive alas with "Suicide"
The catalogue in dialogue
With a young girl’s queries
And jocular I close the gap
To where she’s fixed
With my crude question
"I hope it’s not a choice"
"It was my brother’s
I want to understand"
Such weighty mystery
The urge to leave
With or without goodbye
The leap across the space
From live to die
And though it seems volitional
We sense it is not so
These few less choosers than chosen
Go without a will
But not against it
Yet they think they will
Reaching for self-mastery
Or dreary and forlorn
Against particulars of bond
Against all other selves
To silence what offends
Not comprehending ends
I wish the girl well
Embarrassed to have stumbled
On the face of hell
8/14, 11/4/94, 4/7/96, 3/18/08
Copyright 1994, 2008 by Maurice Leiter
Posted with permission.
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